Trusting in the one who is in control!!!

Proverbs 16:9  "We can make our plans, but God determines our steps."

Proverbs 16:33 " We may throw the dice, but the Lord determines how they fall."

During my reading yesterday I read these two verses and they hit me deep! My husband and I are going through some life changes and we really don't know what the future holds for us. It's exciting but at the same time scary and frustrating. Right now as we speak...we live in a RV in a small town in the middle of the Baaken Oilfield Boom. My husband is a Roustabout and has bigger dreams beyond that. We are 25 and 26 and are ready to start our family. We had a miscarriage last summer and ever since then we have felt the need/desire to bring a child into this world into our family. We have been really busy with life and all the changes that are taking place and trying to settle ourselves down here in the the Great North Dakota. We have just decided that we want to try or make some effort in the process. Well, since all of this has been happening it seems like everyone except us are getting pregnant. Everyday it seems like it is someone new. I am excited for them because it's a new life and babies are just exciting in and of themselves, but I find myself getting jealous. I find myself getting mad at God. I am always asking God "Why not us?" "What are we doing wrong?" and so many other questions. My husband is struggling and it makes me sad. I get excited about pregnancies especially in my family, but my husband gets angry. I try to tell him that God has a plan and that it will happen when God knows that we are ready, but it seems to make him more mad. He always asks me..."Why can't it be us? Why do all these things happen to all these other people and not us? I've been praying and God just doesn't answer my prayers. Is he ignoring me?" It's hard. I don't like feeling negatively, but when I hear my husband's heart hurt like this it starts making the jealousy and the anger stire inside me. I don't like it. Yesterday when I was reading my bible and these two verses came up it was like God was trying to tell me..."Jessica it is all in my timing...just trust me!" So that is what I am doing. I know that eventually when we least expect it, it will happen and our prayers will be answered! God has our best in mind at all times and that is one of the most comforting things to know! I absolutely love it!! God is good and he is at work in our lives!!! For now I will just enjoy being an Auntie!!! It's a blast anyways!!!!